The After Party

Spidey: That was the last guest. They’ve all gone home now.
Matt: Finally. I just want to sit down and drink a couple of beers, watch some stupid telly and nod off.
Spidey: Dips for the stash.
Matt: Fine with me. I need to stay fit.
Spidey: Are you calling me fat?
Matt: Let’s not have this kind of conversation. It’s too Fri and Uni!

FridayNext: Why did they have to leave so early?
UniCorn: Who cares.
FridayNext: I’ve been cooking all day and they leave before midnight. It’s not right!
UniCorn: Honey, I’m still here.
FridayNext: Yeah! And we still have ice cream in the freezer.
UniCorn and FridayNext in UniSon: I’ll race you to the kitchen!
UniCorn: The ice is hard as rock!
FridayNext: Lovely. Mmmm, cookie dough!
UniCorn: I want it to thaw a bit.
FridayNext: No, it’s fine the way it is.
UniCorn: I prefer it a bit mushy.
FridayNext: I don’t.

Spidey: Aaaaaatttttaaacccckkkkkkk!
UniCorn & FridayNext in UniSon: AAAAHHHHHHHH!
Matt: Surprise!
UniCorn: Oh Matt!
FridayNext: Hey, the boys are back.
Spidey: Men. We’re men!
UniCorn: You’re definitely a man, Matt!
Matt: *smiling broadly* I hope so.
Spidey: Hey, whatcha eating?
FridayNext: Ice cream.
Spidey: Is that cookie dough?
FridayNext: No!
Spidey: It is. Share!
FridayNext: No way!
Spidey: Come on!
FridayNext: Goaway!
UniCorn: Matt, want some ice cream? It’s super mega chunky chocolate. I can get you a spoon?
Spidey: Listen and learn, Fri!
FridayNext: Are you kidding?
Matt: I’m fine, thanks. I could do with a beer, though.
UniCorn: I’ll get it!

We all stand in the kitchen practically next to the fridge, and Uni lunges for it before any of us can even react to Matt’s wish for a beer.

UniCorn: Maaaah haaaaah. Sorry, Spidey. Did the door hit your face?
Spidey: Jesus, woman. Take the eagerness down a notch or two! I’ll get a black eye from this!
FridayNext: So the song will go something like this from now on: Black eyes. Baby skies, black eyes.
FridayNext: *laughing hysterically entirely on her own*
FridayNext: Oh come on, it was funny!
Matt: Was it a nice party, sweetie?

He takes the beer that Uni hands him. She gawks a bit too much but as usual he seems completely unaware of her interest. It reminds me of something…what could it be? We all head for the living room to chill.

FridayNext: They left too early. I don’t know why.
Spidey: Well, doing the Penguin Dance probably didn’t help.
UniCorn: You should only use your web for good things.
FridayNext: *sucks in air* Oh my god, Spidey! Did you spy on us?
UniCorn: Anyway, we’re good dancers. It’s just their loss, really. Fri cooked a great meal.
Matt: I could eat…
UniCorn: I’ll fix you a plate!
Matt: Oh. Thanks, Uni.

Spidey pokes my arm after Uni has left the room. I ignore him.

FridayNext: Why are you home so early? Didn’t you have fun?
Matt: Somebody made sure I lost my wallet.
FridayNext: Oh. Spidey, stop poking me!
Spidey: I could eat as well.
FridayNext: Good for you. You know where the kitchen is.
Spidey: Awww! Please, Fri. It’s been a tough night taking Matt cross-town and all.
FridayNext: *sighing* Oh alright then.

Spidey: Hey, cookie dough ice cream! Munch munch.
Matt: You’re evil. And you won’t survive for long.
Spidey: She should learn to share. She’s like a kid sometimes.
Matt: Yeah, I wonder who she reminds me of…
Spidey: Fortunately I don’t understand what you’re hinting at.

Uni is working on a huge plate for Matt when I come into the kitchen. It’s like she’s turned into a great French chef suddenly. I take a plate and toss some food on it for Spidey.

UniCorn: Aww, the boys are home!
FridayNext: Yeah. They’re home.
UniCorn: I really like them.
FridayNext: Oh, you’ve could have fooled me.
UniCorn: They’re so cool, Fri.
FridayNext: I live with them every day. I can assure you that it takes the coolness out of it.
UniCorn: That’s what relationships are like.
FridayNext: What are you on about?
UniCorn: Well, sometimes you wish they would all leave and never come back – and sometimes you wish they’d stay with you forever and never leave you not even for the bathroom.
FridayNext: Eww!
UniCorn: Yeah, but it’s the truth.
FridayNext: Just saying that the boys are well just the boys.
UniCorn: Even though one of them is the sexiest man ever?
FridayNext: Am I the only one who finds him unattractive?
UniCorn: YES!

Spidey: That was delish!
Matt: Tell me that you didn’t finish it all.
Spidey: Oh no. There’s a scoop in the corner.
Matt: You’re dead.
FridayNext: Here you go, Spidey.
Spidey: Tha…
FridayNext: You ate my ice cream?!?
UniCorn: Matt?
Matt: Thanks Uni. Why don’t we go into the kitchen for a bit?
UniCorn: Good call!

An hour and several arguments later.

UniCorn: You’re so wrong!
FridayNext: No, I’m not!
UniCorn: The Fraggles will always beat The Muppets!
FridayNext: Are you kidding? The Fraggles are the lamest! The Muppets rule! Animal for ever!
Spidey: Why…
FridayNext: Shut it! I’m so not listening to you tonight! You ate my ice cream!
Matt: Honey.
FridayNext: What?!
Spidey: Whoa, don’t be all aggressive with him. It’s not his fault!
FridayNext: Who made him lose his wallet?
UniCorn: And The Fraggles are way cooler than The Muppets. Who the hell would wanna be a muppet anyway?
FridayNext: Me! Ich bin ein Muppet Puppet!
Spidey: You’re so losing it, Fri. You’re rambling in a lingo I don’t know.
Matt: Spidey, chilll! Fri, darling. Come here. Sit down. You’re too stressed.
UniCorn: I’ve had a long day as well…
Spidey: Oh God!
FridayNext: I’m fine…
Matt: Friday, get your butt over here and sit down next to me. And Uni, you can sit on my left side. Alright? Alright! Spidey, go get some lame board game. We’re gonna have a quiet evening even if it’s gonna kill us all!

We all do as he orders. We’ve never been this quiet before. Even Uni doesn’t come with some flirty remark about Matt and his body. He puts his arm around me and there’s no way that I’m going to ask him to loosen up a bit even though I can barely turn my head. He’s holding on that tightly. Nobody dares telling him that it’s past 2 am.

Spidey: I just brought what I found in the closet. I’m not sure if I’m up to…
Matt: Sure you are. Uni, you go first.
UniCorn: Okay, Matt!

She throws the dice and gets six.

UniCorn: What colour am I? Blue...and my turn again…another six…I wish I could take you out, Matt. I promise I won’t knock you off your square… But it’s my turn again and I got three black ones in a row so it’s my turn again and oh my gawd, I just escaped Boardwalk and I cash in for always getting on the ladders and not bump into the snakes so I’ll continue and the question is who was the originally drummer in The Who…who…who…god, it’s a planet or a….Moon! Keith Moon. And checkmate! Ha ha, I’ve never won this game before! It’s a lot of fun. Oh, and now I get three darts but only one throw…wait…I’m sure I can do it…There! Oh No! Bull’s Eye. I lost!
Spidey: What the hell did you just do?
FridayNext: She lost. I’m sorry, sweetie. It’s my turn now.
Spidey: That wasn’t a game. It was a mixture of I don’t know.
FridayNext: The point is that she didn’t win so now it’s my turn. Throw me the dice, hon.
UniCorn: I suck at this!
Matt: No, you don’t. You were very good, Uni.
UniCorn: You think?

Uni scoots closer to Matt and closes her eyes. I’m not sure if it’s because it’s past our bedtime. He kisses her on her hair and I can see that her red hair suddenly match her face. Oh Uni!

Spidey: You can’t just make up the games and rules as you go along.
Matt: Spidey, shut up. We’re having a fun evening.
Spidey: They’re cheating, Matt. And Uni sucks even at cheating.
FridayNext: Oi, take that back!
UniCorn: Yeah, whatever she said.

And Uni sends me a goofy smile and I know that she’s not really listening but hoping for another gesture from Matt. It all seems so hilarious and I laugh.

Spidey: What’s so funny?
FridayNext: *giggling* I don’t know.
Spidey: Stop laughing.
FridayNext: *giggling louder* I can’t.
Spidey: You’re freaking me out.
FridayNext: *laughing hysterically* I’m sorry. Stop me.
Matt: Bedtime.
UniCorn: Okay!
Spidey: Go home, Uni. ChessBoy is waiting for you.
FridayNext: *laughing* ChessBoy. What a silly name!
UniCorn: *giggling* It is.
Matt: I’ll walk you down to your car, Uni. Spidey, clean up in here and Fri, go to bed.
UniCorn: You’re so cool, Matt.
FridayNext: *giggling* Bear my children.
UniCorn: *laugh hysterically* Oh my gawd, now I know how you feel.

So I head for the bedroom and I can hear Uni giggling all the way down in the lift. Spidey cleans up the living room and I fall in to bed. He pops his head in.

Spidey: Are we alright, Fri?
FridayNext: Of course we are, Spidey. Always. What a strange day it’s been.
Spidey: Yeah. I’m sorry I lost Matt’s wallet.
FridayNext: I know. Goodnight Spidey.
Spidey: ‘Night.

Matt: Are you sure you are up for driving?
UniCorn: I’m fine, Matt. I just needed some air.
Matt: Alright, then. Drive safely and text us when you get home.
UniCorn: I will, Matty. Thanks.
Matt: *kisses her on her right cheek* Good night, Uni.
UniCorn: *giggles and blushes* ‘Night, Matty.