Riiiinggg
Riiiiiiiiiiiing
UniCorn: *picks up the darn phone – panting* What?
FridayNext: What yourself – what kind of way is that to pick up a phone anyway?
UniCorn: I’m in the middle of something *still panting*
FridayNext: A marathon?
UniCorn: Of course – ‘cause that’s the sort of thing I do, right.
FridayNext: Then what are you doing?
UniCorn: Exercising
FridayNext: Why?
UniCorn: Why what?
FridayNext: Why are you exercising – as you said, it’s not something you do…?
UniCorn: I’m gonna get thin of course
FridayNext: uuhm…why? You’re fab as you are
UniCorn: Thanks, hon, you too. But ChessBoy has been hanging out at University all day. With a certain girl – let’s call her B for Bit…
FridayNext: Yeah, ok, I get your point.
UniCorn: Right, so that’s fine by me. But then he just casually tells me that she has a website – well, her boyfriend made it for them both.
FridayNext: Right, get to the thin part already…
UniCorn: It’s coming right up. He asks me if I want to see it – and I say “Sure, why not” – but inside I’m screaming “BRING IT!”. So we go online and there she is!
FridayNext: …
UniCorn: She’s tiny, and blond, and tanned, and thin, and pretty, and thin!!
FridayNext: Sooo?
UniCorn: And that’s not the worst part… are you ready for this?
FridayNext: I’m so excited I’m jumping up and down
UniCorn: Then I see it: a menu that says “B’s belly” or something. I say: “Click it, click it”… and there she is in a bikini on the beach – blond and tanned and thin. Thin!
FridayNext: So what? Didn’t you say she has a boyfriend?
UniCorn: Yes, but she’s thin and I can’t compete with that.
FridayNext: But ChessBoy’s with you, right. He chose you.
UniCorn: Yeah, but
FridayNext: And he thinks you’re fab and awesome just the way you are, right.
UniCorn: I guess, but
FridayNext: So there’s nothing to worry about
UniCorn: …
FridayNext: I know there’s nothing to worry about
UniCorn: …
FridayNext: Hey! You there?
UniCorn: Yeah…. But she’s thin.
FridayNext: Screw thin – men want women not matchstick men – well, most do anyway
UniCorn: What? Are you going Brokeback now?
FridayNext: You know what I mean.
UniCorn: Yeah. Thanks Friday, you’re a peach.
FridayNext: I know
UniCorn: Why did you call me anyway?
FridayNext: I felt your fuses blowing all the way over here – guess that was when you saw that picture. No, seriously … I forgot.
“It is a sweet thing, friendship, a dear balm,a happy and auspicious bird of calm”
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